6 Ways To Find Your Ancient Face

 

Have you ever found your ancient face then realized it has gone out of focus, again? Probably. It's a common practice in this dimension and, to some degree, denotes the nature of being alive. Possibly, you aren't sure to what I am referring. 

Ancient face?! 

This is a term I have heard sung and the definition to which I am referring is one I have assigned based on soulful music from the early 2000s. The meaning that I've construed and wish to share might not be a new concept for you, however. And I hope it isn't because, if it is, you've undoubtedly been living a solitary life in a vacuum after alien abduction.

Should that be the case, welcome back! You are starved for integration to today's world on Earth. While you've been away, the biggest buzz word with which you need to acquaint yourself before someone leads you astray or reveals your are an alien love child: self-care. Self-care means different things to different people. At first glance, a quick Google search would appear to reveal diagrams in their own rite as being the hallmarks of caring for oneself in this day and age. Not many people would share a consensus for this. It is far more likely bubble baths or facial masks would make a top five (or six) list. Less likely but as important are doing things like intaking nutrition rather than ice cream for every meal and paying off student loans.

To be sure, these are all valid forms of caring for ourselves, but they aren't what I mean by discovering your ancient face. For this, I mean returning to who you are at your very core. This is the egoless version of yourself, the essence of your being, and "who" you are between lifetimes. We can attain this level of quieting the noise within ourselves to varying degrees with different techniques. It should be of no surprise that when we practice them, we get better at them, yielding improving benefits.


Assuming you have already heard of self-care, these practices can also be explained as ways to ground or center yourself. These are ways to self-soothe and can take away the allure escaping into substances. When you see your ancient face, you know you are okay. 

Breathing. 

I'm going to piss off some anxious people right from the jump, here, but, for whatever it's worth, I assure you that is not my intention. In fact, I totally understand how condescending it sounds for someone to tell you that you need to learn how to remember to breathe. How stupid right? It ranks right up there with "sleep hygiene" and getting a piece of paper telling you how to go to bed. (Personally, that is the one that almost made me leave.) I know nobody who doesn't already subscribe to what I'm going to say to advocate breathing wants to hear it, but if I haven't lost you already, please, keep reading. Regulating your breathing does trigger your parasympathetic nervous system, which does regulate your emotions. 

This is precisely why something so basic as "breathing" is recommended in the form of breathing exercises or, sometimes, they're called breathing techniques. It is a scientifically proven fact. The problem is that people who say it make it sound far too simple, which can feel invalidating when you are explaining how wrecked you are feeling and are asking for real help. I think therapists miss the mark on how they present these tools in the beginning. Usually people who are coming for their first appointments are pushed to the brink of not wanting to hear there is some easy-peasy solution. First, we need to be heard. Validated.

In this case, being correct is not mutually exclusive. Breathing (and sleep hygiene, ugh) can help, but it is definitely not the only tool you need. Just bear in mind it is the one you will always be able to access. If for no other reason, that make activating the vagus nerve, which is linked to parasympathetic nervous system and responsible for relaxation, an advantageous endeavor.

Fortunately for me, I heard it enough times by enough people and read some science on it that I stopped balking. I also understand that breathing is a huge part of yoga and have felt its benefits so it wasn't a stretch to think breathing mindfully could be helpful. Turns out, it's been crucial to being reactive and keeping me from doing things I might regret later, like walking straight out the door of my workplace.

Good Good: breathe out a count or two longer than you breathe in.


Breathwork

Since we're on the topic, let's go ahead and take a look at breathwork. It is not the same as breathing techniques. A friend I've had since elementary school who, like me, has a clinical PTSD diagnosis. He insists he has done breathwork doing a 4 count breathing technique on an app. Yes, that is working with breathing, but I promise him and will promise you that what I am referencing is not the same. 

Breathwork is an ancient East Indian practice that part of the Western world has adopted. Many practitioners will book out a two hour appointment that is conducted in either in a group or an individual session. A very abbreviated synopsis is that you will get comfortable on a mat and use blankets to cover yourself. It's best to wear non-restrictive clothing because clothing that is pinching or pulling as you lie down can be distracting. Pay attention to the person who is leading you. They will orientate then guide you with descriptions, a little instruction, and the music begins. They'll be there to help. Be sure you give yourself time to linger when the session winds down and keep the day or evening free, afterwards. Lots of water, nutrition and other self-care. 

Definitely follow the links to find out more, and check out a review of my own, most recent, breathwork experience!

Helpful Hint: Wear your glasses instead of contacts and HYDRATE!


Yoga Nidra

Yoga nidra is another ancient East Indian practice that has been brought to the West. The general rule of thumb is that 30 minutes of yoga nidra equals three hours of sleep. That's how rejuvenating it is for the body, mind and spirit! The name might sound misleading to some so allow me to clarify. Rather than being a physical exercise, yoga nidra is a meditation that puts your body in a sleep-like state. A session will begin getting comfortable, just like I described, above, for the first part of a breathwork session.

A trained practitioner will lead you through a meditation that will put you in a state like no other. I'm making this statement to include those of you who might already practice other forms of meditation. If you get to the meditative state, you will drop even deeper into it and find the essence of who you are, as in your ancient spirit. I know, I know... but all of the rest fades away when you are at the core of yourself. Like your breath, you always have access to reach that amazing, tranquil, and trancelike space.

Helpful Hint: Amrit Method is how I was introduced and remains my favorite. 

More about Amrit Method Yoga Nidra.

Peer Support

Recovery Dharma is a Buddhist principled approach recovery group that is practiced worldwide. Personally, I did not have any interest in a typical 12 step program when I agreed it was probably a good idea for me to stay sober so that I could finally make progress on processing trauma. Recovering from substance abuse would also let my brain heal so I could learn how to store events in places of the brain that is favorable for a life that isn't whipped maladaptive coping mechanisms. One of mine was compulsive drinking. Without knowing how to cope with trauma, they result from those events and dictate our behaviors, which likely include some degree of self-destruction. 

Recovery Dharma is a support group that can help people overcome a variety of self-destructive behavior. Insert name here. Sex? Shopping? Gambling? Thieving? It doesn't matter what it is. There are groups all around the world that you can drop in on to check it out. You can keep your camera off and just listen to get a feel for it, if you like. 

A typical meeting will start with opening statements that you will hear at any and all Recovery Dharma meetings. Then someone will lead you through a meditation that is usually chosen by them and lasts about 20 minutes. Afterwards, there will be a short reading from the Recovery Dharma book, which follows Buddhist traditions of The Eightfold Path and Four Noble Truths. (It can be ordered or there is a free PDF available to download and print.) Next, those who want to share whatever is on their minds have a chance to get it out in a safe space. There is no crosstalking (feedback); no one can respond. It's a place to be heard without judgement. Meetings wrap up with concluding statements that, like the opening statements, are standard for all Recovery Dharma meetings. 

There is no talk about any 12 step programs, and the most religious entity you might hear referenced is the Universe. If that sounds like something you might dig, I encourage you to check it out. This link will show meetings for every day in every time zone and includes international.

Helpful Hint: Sharing is daunting but quite catharsis.

Connecting (especially when you want to isolate)

It is so easy to isolate ourselves when we are dealing with the effects of trauma, and there are several reasons we do it. I excel at it. The truth is, I do actually like time alone. I like it so much I can blur the lines on healthy time alone and unhealthy. It has been said that humans are social creatures, that we need other people - that we need community. I can shy away from this convention, but if you can keep a secret I will tell you that I believe it is true. I have felt camaraderie and the wonderful feeling of being accepted and a part of something greater than myself.

Sometimes, I just want to be left alone, though. It's usually when I am in a depressive funk. I'm like an injured animal that finds a place to either heal or die. When I get to that point, I have found that connecting with someone I love, especially my parents, but for sure there are other family and friends who spending time with or even talking on the phone (for the dearest across a distance) helps.

It has been quite some time, sadly, but I used to regularly volunteer with houseless outreaches and give service to those who need a helping hand, too. I've served food in a buffet line, driven around and helped people who stow themselves beneath the overpasses, around the sidewalks with tents, and have been back into camps that roll deep and are hidden in places you wouldn't suspect that, in a literal sense, holds space for an underworld community.

Distributing essential items such as you might find out an outreach wishlist like socks and other clothing items, bug spray, sunscreen, toiletries, shelter (tents), warmth (blankets, sternos, etc.), and imperative needs such as food and water is a huge help to serve humanity. It will make you both feel good. I have to say, though, that for all of the tangible items I have passed out and been thanked, the biggest value I have ever brought is holding spiritual space for others, letting them be seen in a society that is quick to overlook those who have no houses, no homes, for various reasons. Listening to these humans' human stories, hugging these people, looking them in the eyes, shaking hands, learning names... those are invaluable ways of connecting to others and if you're humble, with the right intentions, a sense of connectedness will help your soul, too.

Helpful Hint: Let humanity move you.

Gardening

Playing in the dirt, Earthing, is a topic I've recently discussed in two parts and how it correlates to mental health. I'd love for you to check it out! How Does Your Garden Grow? Part One and Part Two are linked.

Helpful hint: Skip the gloves and get your hands dirty!

I hope you will try out of my suggestions for help coping through life! None of them are going to hit the spot all of the time, but that's why those of us who have been in trauma therapy for even a short time (seven years for me) hears about "tools" and "your toolkit". Any tool you can add to it is helpful and, truly, that goes for everybody. We all need a little help steadying ourselves in life. I'd love to know some of your methods or tools in your toolkit!

Please share your ways to cope through difficult times, below!